Of course, that was then. This is now. Over time we've developed, and there are now new sins on the market that are equally unforgivable. Being boring is a sin that cannot be overlooked. People who are confident must be shunned as evil. And, of course, that whole exclusivity thing will never fly.
People hate it when someone claims "This way is the only way." They'll say foolish things like, "That is what caused the Holocaust." Never mind that there is nothing logically wrong with the claim that one religion is correct, or that when you have competing claims of exclusivity, logic demands that not all can be true. It's ironic that so many like the words of Jesus but reject His claim "No man comes to the Father but by Me." So being the only way is another unpardonable sin these days.
Related to the exclusivity error is the sin of questioning someone else's salvation. That, too, is unacceptable, it seems. You may be free to believe what you want, but never question whether someone else is saved. If he or she calls himself a Christian, then don't look a gift Christian in the mouth. It's not a social faux pas, like asking a woman her age. It's wrong.
That bothers me. You see, there are people I know, people I dearly love, whose eternal destiny is unclear to me. I don't know where they will go once they die. And since they are people I dearly love, that's important to me. But I'm told that if they tell me that they are saved, I'm supposed to back off and leave them alone. It's morally wrong to ask more questions. It's unkind and unwarranted and downright mean.
Here's the problem. The Bible is quite clear that the unsaved would mix in with the saved. Israel, God's chosen people, was full of folks under God's wrath. Jesus told more than one parable about the sheep and the goats, the wheat and the tares, and so on. These are the look-alikes, those who are hard to distinguish from the real thing. But they're wrong. He warned of false prophets who appear to do miracles in Jesus's name. The source of John's so-called "antichrists" is the Church.
Children, ... many antichrists have come. Therefore we know that it is the last hour. They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would have continued with us. But they went out, that it might become plain that they all are not of us (1 John 2:18-19).If Jesus felt it was such an important concern about false brethren in our midst that He repeated the warning over and over, shouldn't we be equally concerned? If the Bible is quite clear that many will think they are among the elect who are not, shouldn't we be concerned? If we care about the condition of others around us, shouldn't we care about this?
The problem, of course, is the test. How do you know? We aren't saved by perfect doctrine, so we can't (and it would be dangerous to do so) say, "Your doctrine is imperfect, so you might not be saved." People will protest when we suggest "essential Christian doctrines", doctrines the denial of which might suggest that someone isn't a believer, but perhaps that has some validity. Jesus suggested, "You will recognize them by their fruits" (Matt 7:16), but people really hate it when you suggest that. And, let's be honest, it becomes very easy to become Pharisaical (or at least to sound Pharisaical) in this endeavor, as if we are determining who is in and who is not because we are the wise ones and the rest of you ... not so much.
So I find myself on the horns of a dilemma. I don't want to be unnecessarily judgmental. I don't want to be passing judgment -- deciding "You're in and you're out". I'm not entirely clear on good tests for the question. But, as I said, when there are people about whom I care and their eternal destiny is in the balance, is it right for me to simply wink and nod and say, "Whatever you think is okay with me. If you're damned for it, it's not my concern."? Do I tempt this "unpardonable sin" of questioning the salvation of others, or do I keep my mouth shut and let them go to Hell without a word because it would be rude to do otherwise? Seems wrong to me somehow.
8 comments:
It is wrong. Of course, there's a time and a place for it, but to let someone carry on in their false understanding is tantamount to approval. If the subject in question can be broached, and the "offender" refuses to see the truth, one must accept that at some point and hope they someday receive an epiphany of some sort.
OTOH, if they continue to visit one's blog...one must unload! :)
I understand that I don't want to point fingers and cry, "Repent, heathen!" I understand that the primary motivation is love and, as such, I cannot be cruel, arrogant, or unkind in the approach. But it seems to me that if I care I cannot say nothing.
In my life, I've made some stupid decisions. (Okay, more than just "some".) Some of these have been in advance, where I've told people who I believed cared about me, "This is what I plan to do." So very often they would nod and smile and say, "God bless you in your endeavors" or something similar. And when the stupidity became apparent, I'd say, "What happened??!!" And they'd say, "Yeah, I was afraid of that." And I'd always wonder to myself, "Well, if you thought this would be the case, why didn't you warn me?" I'm afraid that self-interest and "getting along" too often get in the way of genuine love. In the case of eternal issues, I would think that self-interest and "getting along" would pale in comparison to an eternity in Hell.
Stan,
This is the same problem we face when we want to give someone honest feedback in any area, isn't it?
When your wife asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?" and it does, should you tell her? Or is she really just fishing for a compliment?
One of my kids' friends just had a baby... out of wedlock with a guy who has no money and probably won't be around for too long. She has no money. She's relying on welfare and handouts to care for her child financially... She does not have the wherewithal to care for a child. She can't really even take care of herself. Yet her parents and everyone around her are congratulating her. Telling her they're proud of her "accomplishment".
I just remain silent in the matter because what I have to say about it will just make me look like the one "trying to bring her down" when really, I'll just be the only one who is being completely honest.
On to your dilemma... If god elects those whom He elects... "For Jacob I loved and Esau I hated", won't they actually avoid eternal damnation anyway? Is there something YOU can do to save them? Maybe once you add God's predestination or election into the mix, it'll all work for the good of those who love Him. but not because of anything we've done.
Mike: "If god elects those whom He elects ... won't they actually avoid eternal damnation anyway?"
On a technicality, true, but there are a couple of problems. First, God has not seen fit for reasons unclear to me to share with me who is and who is not elect. God knows who will avoid eternal damnation, but I don't. Second, I am commanded to share the truth. We are commanded, for instance, to share the Gospel. We are commanded to reprove and rebuke. That kind of thing. Ezekiel was told to tell his people that they were sinning. God went on to say that if he did it, God would hold them responsible, but if he didn't, God would hold him responsible.
God elects, but He has decided to make use of means. He uses preaching. He uses evangelism. He uses the Word. He uses prayer. And we participate with Him in these things while He works. Now, it could be that my words to one of those for whom I'm concerned are the very tool that God intends to use to turn them. Great! Or it could be that my words have no effect ... in which case God has my words to point to at the Judgment and say, "You were told." In either case, it's effective.
Since I don't know who is elect and since God uses means to accomplish His ends and since I am commanded to take part in that effort, I think I'm obligated by love for them and obedience to God to say something.
Stan,
I think I'm obligated by love for them and obedience to God to say something.
what happens though when you do say something and they see it as you being judgmental (which I get a lot, by the way), they start thinking that all Christians are judgmental and decide they want no part in this sort of thing. Then they drift away and go to the "liberal crowd" who will always just tell them what they wanna hear.
I've seen this sort of thing a lot where I live (Seattle area). I'm not saying I see many Christians leaving the church or anything like that, but people who we try to reach are often caught up in that whole "you're judging me" thing.
\
I think this could certainly apply to people who are already Christians or who are maybe saved, but starting to drift away...
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you're wrong in your thinking. Quite the opposite. You and I are in the same boat here. I'm just thinking this through and tossing it around a bit...
I often am chastised for telling the truth because someone's feelings get hurt.
"what happens though when you do say something and they see it as you being judgmental "
Yeah, right, like that would happen. No, kidding, of course. When doesn't it?
Years ago a friend and I were talking and he was saying that he needed to talk with his wife about something she was doing that was wrong. Finally he said, "No, I'm not gonna. She'll just get mad." I asked him, "Do you only do what is right if you believe it will be effective?" My point, then, is that I need to determine if it is right, not how they will react.
The other side, however, is of key importance. I specified when I wrote the post that my concern was for people I love dearly. If my goal is to correct people, it will be perceived as judgmental ... because it is. But my goal is love. It is said, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend." I always need to check my own heart. You know, log in the eye, that kind of thing. Am I trying to be right or am I speaking out of genuine concern? You know that if you are told something bad by something who you know loves you, it doesn't hurt quite as much and you can bear it much better. So it would be absolutely imperative to me that 1) I love the person, 2) I am motivated by that love (as opposed to "righteous indignation", being "right", or any other such thing), and 3) that I express it as humbly and lovingly as I can.
Will that avoid the accusation of "judgmental"? No, not likely. In this case, refer to the previous paragraph. And if they tell me, "You shouldn't say that; you'll hurt someone's feelings," I say, "Better hurt feelings than Hell" (or something equally pithy).
In regard to Mike's first comment, I would LIKE my husband to tell me if something I'm wearing makes me look fat, then I can try to find something less fattening to wear.
So much is in the HOW we say things, obviously. If he were to just say something like, "Well, that's NOT really your best dress. I think you have other things that look nicer on you," I'd find that a rather diplomatic, gracious, and loving way of telling me it makes me look FAT. Or... let's say skinny for a change, okay? As in, "Honey, do these pants make me look gaunt?" Anyway, in this particular situation, I think the truth would be a GOOD thing to hear. Simply become a diplomat on the spot, Guys!
And in regard to those situations where you venture to step out and state that something a group of people is doing is wrong and you get dirty looks or are told you are being judgmental... all those people have to go to bed that night. And I think a lot of people, finally alone in the dark and quiet, think back about their day's events and may come to the conclusion that you were brave for actually speaking out for what you believe, what you think is right. Now, away from the herd, they may even come to the realization that you were right. Even if they may not 100% agree with you, they may have some degree of admiration for you choosing to speak out. Or... not. But I like to think such nice thoughts, like that ultimately truth prevails. :o)
Then there are times when all it takes is one person to speak out against whatever everyone else is doing and then others will be emboldened by that bravery, realize they feel the same, and will follow.
One day when our daughter was maybe in 4th grade, she mentioned to me she had told her friend that her friend's divorced mom getting pregnant by her neighbor/boyfriend was a sin. Apparently her friend told her mom our daughter thought that was "a sin" and oh boy. I can only imagine how that might have gone down. For some reason, we didn't see much of those people anymore, when previous to that our girls were together a lot. I imagine the mom thought we parents had heard the news and told our daughter that was a sin, but we didn't even know she was pregnant. Our daughter came up with that on her own.
The thing is... that mom had walked away from the Lord years ago and I'm quite sure she knows sin got her into her situation, but my daughter's mistake was to actually call it what it is.
Unfortunately I had to educate my daughter after she so innocently mentioned that to me. She said she didn't say it in any kind of a mean way (because she really liked the mom!), but just that she and her friend had been talking about the pregnancy and how they both felt about it. I had to tell our daughter that this situation IS sin and she's right, but that people just don't want others ever actually SAYING such things are sin. A pastor, priest, or counselor might be able to get away with it, but not the average guy on the street. The word "sin" is like a 4 letter word, only much worse to a lot of people. You can hardly say it anymore without coming off looking like the bad guy ...the sinful one.
Good post, Stan.
Helpful stuff, Sherry. Thanks.
I've always believed on the "Does this make me look fat?" dilemma that since I love my wife it is best to be honest. I mean, seriously, if she didn't look fat, but a dress made her look fat, would I want her to go out like that? No more than if I've got my collar turned up funny and don't know it. I want her to say, "Your collar is funny; let me fix it." (On the other hand, I've never known a dress that makes someone look fat. And I've never seen my wife as anything but beautiful. And my wife is much too wise to play that game. So I've never had to actually face the dilemma.)
Post a Comment