The Idolatry of Sex

Some time ago I wrote about The Theology of Sex. This suggests that there is a theological component to sexual relations -- a "God" aspect. Indeed, I argued that there was. This suggests another possibility. If there is a theological component to sex, is is possible that a wrong view of sex results in or from idolatry?

Well, maybe.

I would suggest, however, that most of our sexual problems -- sins, lusts, etc. -- result from exactly that. Here, let me explain.

We are God's creation made to enjoy Him. As the Westminster Catechism puts it, our chief end is "to glorify God and enjoy Him forever." Now, if "enjoy Him forever" is in view here and we're talking about God, it would seem to me that this would be some magnificent, all-encompassing, perfectly fulfilling, end-of-the-question enjoyment.

And yet ... we want ... something ... more. Now, how is that? Well, it has been said that humans are idol factories. We turn them out regularly. Oh, sure, we might avoid the wooden ones or the metal ones, but those other ones seem inescapable. We'll substitute self in a heartbeat. Pride, power, money, fame, lust ... oh, wait ... lust! Yes, that's one very common idol.

And that's where I was headed. According to some studies, some 43% of Internet users view pornography online. A Pew study last year found that 12% (25% of men and 8% of women) of Internet users admit to looking at porn online. Now, what that simply means is that 66% of respondents are liars. It's a problem. It's a big problem. And it's not going away. It's not even being addressed. And that's just the pornographic aspect. There's the fact that 41% of babies born in America are born to single mothers (and if you want to have a broken heart, start looking at the age and race statistics). According to the CDC, the births to unmarried women sent from 18.4% in 1980 to a peak of 41% in 2009, and our current 40.7% represents a decrease to that peak. Oh, yeah, we have a problem.

What is this problem? We've managed, in claiming to be wise, to become fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for the creation. We have managed to worship the creature rather than the Creator. Sex is a prime example. What is it that is typically in view? "Sexual fulfillment". They need to "feel whole". It's about chemistry, about identity, about love. Large numbers (they tell me) have sex without even any real pleasure. There are other motivations. There is power and there is self-image. There is naughty and nice. There is personal satisfaction (as opposed to "performance anxiety"). There is connection. There are lots of reasons for the urgency of sex.

And when you think about it, most of it is either explicitly sinful (like pride and lust) or simply a refusal to worship the One who made us. We are seeking to find in sex (when you strip out the sin, obviously) what God has offered in Himself. And we seek it with such passion that it cannot be called anything but worship. Idolatry (1 Peter 4:3).

Odd, isn't it? God wants us to have Himself as our ultimate fulfillment and He gave us love, marriage, and sex as a gift. Not to replace Him, but as a gift. And we replace the Giver with the gift. We think we need fulfillment in sex and identity in sex and relationship in sex and He offered that as a gift, not as a god. Kind of makes it a problem, doesn't it? It should be a glorious gift from a heavenly Father between two people who are enjoying God and, as a consequence, can be completely satisfied with one another. Now, more often than not, it's an occasion for some sin or another. We can't fix that in our world, but perhaps it's something that we should address in ourselves.