Happy Father's Day

It's Father's Day, and what better way to celebrate than to tell you about my dad?

I have an unusual father. I mean that in the best possible way. I've never really met anyone else like my dad. He doesn't fall into the stereotypes. He doesn't fit the mold. He's not like everyone else's dad. He's a good father.

My dad is a good father for several reasons. First and foremost, he models what he preaches. I've never seen my dad offer advice that he didn't take himself. I've always seen him acting on the principles that he espouses. Funny story that illustrates something of my experience with my father. This occurred way back when I was a kid. We were on a trip (Dad loves to travel) and Dad asked Mom if she had brought a particular pair of pants for him to wear. She hadn't. He said, "Oh, that's too bad. I wish you had." End of encounter. I told my sister, "I hate it when they argue like that" because that was my perspective of "arguing" that I learned from my dad. To my recollection, that was the harshest he ever spoke to her. From the way he interacts with his wife (my mom) to the way that he interacts with his kids (my siblings and I) to the way he interacts with those around him, he is amazingly consistent. One of the reasons for this and one of the things I really appreciate about him is that it is in his character to think rather than feel. I don't mean to suggest that he doesn't feel. That would be nonsense. But he operates basically on a logical rather than emotional basis. And that's a good thing.

I can see this characteristic in a variety of places. When we took our trip together in March, he had the whole thing mapped out in advance. He had researched the best places to stay overnight, what he planned to do at those places, and the best places to buy gas. He had an itinerary both on a map and on a calendar. This is not to suggest that he hasn't a spontaneous bone in his body. When he travels, he likes to explore. So in his meticulous planning, he includes room for spontaneous exploring. "Let's leave a couple extra days at this place because we might find some interesting things to look at between here and there." That kind of thing. But he does that kind of thing in so many areas. He knows what he wants in a church and goes to find it. His experience working for the county of Los Angeles taught him a lot about how to run a county, and he has applied that extensive knowledge to helping run his housing community. He thinks about what he should do, and he does it. I very, very much admire that in my father.

One of the things that is amazing about him is his ability to interact with people. To us kids, my father was always quiet and not very sociable. Turn him loose, however, and he's talking to the guy at the next gas pump or the couple at the next RV spot or the neighbor down the street. In his community, everyone calls him for help because he's always out and about and everyone knows him. He can strike up a conversation with a fellow RVer or a fellow engineer or a fellow fisherman or a fellow human being at the drop of a hat. He is always personable, always knowledgeable, always approachable. We always saw him as quiet and reserved, but that's not the man I observe these days.

Another thing about my father that is a real joy is the long term observation I've had. The truth is that my father when I was growing up is not the same man as my father today. The primary reason that our perception was that he was always quiet and reserved is that he was. He rarely ever expressed an emotion, positive or negative. We almost never saw him angry, but we also almost never saw him elated. He didn't really interact much with us too deeply. Oh, he spent time with us, and for that I'm very grateful, but digging into what we thought, felt, dreamt, etc. ... well, that just wasn't his thing. But God has been working in him over the years. He has become engaged. I've seen him cry when he tells a story that moves him. I've seen him develop a sense of humor, something we rarely saw before. I've seen him love his wife in ways that seemed foreign to him before. He has become the dream husband my mom always wanted. He has become involved in his kids' and their kids' lives like he never was before. He cares like he never did before. This man is a walking, talking, living illustration of the hand of God in someone's life.

I have a lot of reasons to be grateful for my father. These are just a few of them. Thanks, Father, for my father. Thanks, Dad, for being such an excellent dad. Happy Father's Day.