Happy Birthday, David

Today, too many years ago (you don't need to know how many), my firstborn son came into the world. I've mentioned my second son. Well, today is the birthday of my first.

This son is the one I mentioned in my post in favor of gay marriage. (And my firstborn feels his heart skip a beat. "What???!!!") No, he's not is homosexual. He had a happy marriage, the only reasonable definition of "gay marriage" that I recognize. So my son is happily married to his lovely bride, and I'm glad to have her in the family.

My son has been a blessing to me. From the early days when my sons moved out of the house we've remained close. We would meet once a week for breakfast to discuss ... things. Theology, life, all sorts of things. He has always been teachable and eager to examine the truth. He doesn't back down from the hard questions and doesn't allow them to turn him away when the answers don't fully satisfy.

When I was turning 30 and he was just a little child I asked him, "Do you think your dad is old?" "Oh, yes, Dad," he assured me in all seriousness. "Really? How old?" "Oh," he said, "real old." "'Real old'? Just how old do you think I am?" "Oh," he answered thoughtfully, "at least 18." "I love you, son."

I remember years ago when he came home from public junior high school one day, he was excited. "Dad! I finally learned the difference between a liberal and a conservative!" "Oh, really? What's that?" "A liberal wants to help people and a conservative just wants to keep it all for himself!" You should have seen his face when I said, "You may want to revisit that definition, son. Your father is defined as a conservative." Now, to many, such a comment from a father would be a potential death knell. "There goes any credibility for you, Dad." But my son didn't see it as such. He saw it as a reason to question what he had learned. And he learned something new.

One time in high school he got a phone call from a girl at school. I gave him the phone and walked out of the room but not out of ear shot. (It wasn't my intention; it's just that he was located in the kitchen -- somewhere too hard to be out of ear shot.) I only got one side of the conversation, obviously, but it was interesting to hear. "Yeah, I know about it. No, I can't go. ... No, my dad won't let me. ... No, I haven't asked, but he doesn't let us do that. ... Well, sure I could lie to him, but he'd kill me." If you could have heard the tone of the last phrase, it wasn't fear; it was respect. His words spoke of punishment but his tone spoke of respect.

He has been a blessing as he grew up and learned important lessons in life, lessons like being honest. I remember the time he did something wrong out of my wife's presence. She found the evidence and demanded, "Who did this?!" He stunned her by responding honestly, "I did. I'm sorry." Not what one might expect. I remember the time I told him to do something and he said, "Dad, I am going to do as you asked. I just want to ask a question, and it's just for my education. Why?" He understood, you see, that obedience and respect were mandatory, but that questions from respect were perfectly okay. Important lessons in life, indeed.

He's older now and married and on his own. I'm quite proud of him. He has grown in maturity and has grown spiritually and he is a delight to this old man. We share a common bond and we share a common Lord and I am quite proud to call him my son, my firstborn. Happy Birthday, David.