Unfinished Songs

Generally speaking, I am not a man given to emotional outbursts. I think those who know me best would concur. Sometimes, though ...

When my wife and I were planning our wedding, I mostly kept out of it. I understood that weddings were made for brides -- make it her day. But I did have at least one input. I hoped, for our wedding day, to sing a special song for her.
Stephen Curtis Chapman's I Will Be Here said so clearly what I wanted to say to my bride. Of course, that dream died quickly. It did say what I wanted, but there was no way I could get that accomplished without breaking down. Too close to the heart. So we had Stephen Curtis Chapman sing it (a recording, not live).

You know what I mean? There are a lot of good songs out there from a lot of sources, but there a some -- a few -- that just stop me in my tracks. I cannot sing them straight-faced, so to speak. Too close to the heart. Some I can hardly even talk about without tearing up or a quaver in my voice. These are what I'm calling "unfinished songs," not because they're not finished, but because if it were up to me, we'd never get to the end of them.

I love "How Great Thou Art." The song stands tall in glorifying God. It stirs the heart and soul. Written originally by a Swedish pastor caught in a sudden thunderstorm on a mountainside, then enjoying the after-scene, it pulls from Psalm 8's "How majestic is Your Name in all the earth" (Psa 8:1) theme. Later it migrated to Russia where English translators picked it up. One of them, Stuart Hine, added the popular third verse.

And when I think that God, His Son not sparing,
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.

See, that's the one for me. That's the trigger point, the end of my reasoned singing. God sent Him to die. Jesus died to bear my burden. He bled and died to take away my sin. Don't ask me to lead in singing that verse. I have to stop there.

In times like ours, a classic hymn like "Be Still My Soul" cannot be more appropriate. Filled with reminders to "Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain" because "the Lord is on thy side" and that "thy best, thy heav'nly Friend thro' thorny ways leads to a joyful end" are timeless as we all endure such things in life. Being a devotee of a Sovereign God, however, the line that really hits me is at the end of the second verse.

Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice, who ruled them while He dwelt below.

We don't find peace in avoiding difficulties. The Greek word in the New Testament for "perseverance" means literally "to remain under." We find peace that passes understanding in the confidence of His love and care and comfort in the midst of hardships. In a COVID/BLM moment, it is immense comfort that we walk with the One who ruled the storm.

More contemporary songs can have a similar effect on me. Downhere's My Last Amen gets me every time. It's about the internal almost subliminal recognition that there is something more beyond "here and now." It's about the deep yearning to be where we belong -- in the presence of our Savior. It is an intrinsic desire for faith to be sight, to no longer pray, "Amen -- let it be so," but to have it be so. That's my heart's desire. Or take MercyMe's "Even If." The song is one of anguish. Things are not going as they should. God isn't doing what you want Him to. Premised on the words of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (Dan 3:16-18), the cry is "Even if You don't, my hope is You alone." That's my cry. It's not a demand for better treatment; it's a reminder that He is enough ... always. It calls to attention that God doesn't always act the way we want, but He always does what's best. I must call that to mind often.

On a whimsical note, I've heard respins of a lot of traditional hymns in recent years. Mostly I applaud the effort. I heard a few versions of "Praise to the Lord, the Almighty." And I'm just amused that the modern generation doesn't know how to pronounce "Gladly for aye we adore Thee." I mean, they love the pirate culture. They even have an "International Talk Like a Pirate Day." So why do pirates say "I, I, captain," and modern singers sing "Gladly for A we adore Thee"? Just makes me laugh. Sorry ... I digress.

There are truths that touch me at my core. Most of them are the truths that transcend my meager grasp of things and call me to Someone higher. The reminder that He is in charge despite my faulty perceptions in good and bad times is an ever-present help. The reminder of His grace and mercy to one who deserved neither is my constant need. These kinds of things really get me right where it counts, and I have to stop and think and pray and praise God.