Honor

In Romans Paul writes, "Outdo one another in showing honor." (Rom 12:10) It is part of "Let love be genuine" (Rom 12:9) and "Love one another with brotherly affection" (Rom 12:10), but in this phrase, Paul focuses on "honor." The concept is premised on the principle of presenting your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God," (Rom 12:1) (that concludes with "which is your spiritual (or reasonable) worship.") So, on the basis of living the Christian life as a sacrifice to God, love. Love big time. Love genuinely. Love your fellow believers. And, love by showing honor. So, what is this thing called "honor"?

The Greek word is τιμή -- timē -- which is based on the concept of payment and refers first to the idea of valuing something or someone. God commanded that we honor our parents (Exo 20:12; Eph 6:2-3). Paul urges is to "pay to all what is owed to them" and includes, among other things, "honor." (Rom 13:7) Peter warned husbands to show honor to their wives "so that your prayers may not be hindered." (1 Peter 3:7) Peter also says we should "Honor everyone" including "the emperor" (1 Peter 2:17). The dictionary says that the verb "to honor" means to treat someone with "honesty, fairness, or integrity," to give "high respect." Perhaps in that you can see the same concept as the root word from Greek. To honor someone is to treat them with the honesty, fairness, integrity, and respect that they deserve. And, lest we get tripped up on that concept of "deserve," remember that "deserve" is built in. God is the Creator that made us in His image (Gen 1:27; Gen 9:6) and made us "a little lower than the angels." (Psa 8:5-6) All humans deserve some measure of honor. So, honor is an internal attitude of respect, courtesy, and reverence and everyone deserves it.

It gets interesting, then, when we consider how Paul makes it a kind of competition: "Outdo one another in showing honor." "See which of you can be more honest, fair, and respectful to others. See who is best at courtesy and reverence, especially among fellow believers." And when you consider the meaning of honor, it precludes dishonorable competition to show honor, doesn't it? "I win! I showed more honor than you! Neener, neener." That doesn't work at all. So it's a friendly, honest, fair, respectful competition in which the only losers are the ones that don't "play."

It is sad, then, when genuine Christians seem to lack this drive. Jesus said we would be known as His by our love for one another (John 13:35). John wrote, "Everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of Him." (1 John 5:1) Outdoing one another in showing honor is part of love. But not us. We're standing firm on not showing honor. We're stingy with our respect and short on courtesy. By our actions and attitudes we declare to one another frequently, "I do not find you worth my showing you the honor that God commands." To our own disgrace.

When Peter urged his readers to always be prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you, he included the guidance, "Yet, with gentleness and respect." (1 Peter 3:15) Believers especially, but even skeptics and other unbelievers, simply as humans, deserve to be honored. We can disagree, even strongly, over ideas, principles, doctrines, and practices, but we must do so while giving people the honor God has indicated they are due. We may not even choose to "agree to disagree." We still need to outdo one another in showing honor to all those whom God has made. It should be a hallmark of every believer.