James addresses a common problem among humans in general and Christians in particular. He asks, "What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you?" He answers his own question. "Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members?" Then he says, "You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures" (James 4:1-3). According to James, we have a big problem ... our primary concern and, also, our quarrels and conflicts, are all centered on ... self. "I want." "I'm concerned about my own pleasures." "I am the important one, and even when I talk to God about it, I'm asking for ... me."
James says it's "adultery" ... the Bride of Christ worshiping self rather than her Husband. By seeking our own desires over everyone else, we are giving our affection to ourselves, not Him. James says it is "friendship with the world" and it is "hostility toward God" (James 4:4). James says that God "jealously desires the Spirit which He has made to dwell in us" (James 4:5). Interesting. The concept of God as "jealous" isn't just here. God says it (Exo 20:5) and it is repeated (e.g., Exo 34:14; Deut 4:24; Josh 24:19; Nahum 1:2). Linked to His holiness and His love, God claims to be jealous and ... He's serious.
Understand ... "jealousy" is not necessarily bad. Jealousy, contrasted with envy, is the fear or anger over the loss of something that is yours (or you believe to be yours). Envy, on the other hand, is the desire to possess what someone else possesses. In this sense, God ... owns us ... and He is righteously angry if anyone, us included, tries to take us from Him. It's part of His love and holiness. And when we spend our prayers trying to obtain for ourselves the pleasures we seek for ourselves, we make Him our enemy. I would think that people who classify themselves as believers would prefer to avoid that status of being God's enemy. Our standard, human approach to life of "me first" is antithetical to a living, breathing relationship with God. We must, then, "Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded" (James 4:7-8). Repeatedly.
7 comments:
It has been my experience that people usually mix up jealousy and envy in everyday conversation. Ever since I learned of the distinction that you mention between the terms, I have been careful to keep them straight. Envy might accompany covetousness and is fairly straightforward, but jealousy is more relational, interpersonal, and almost contractual (i.e. the keeping/breaking of wedding vows). (I am grateful that the Lord has essentially eradicated both those emotions from my daily life.) I remember hearing many years ago that Oprah Winfrey deserted her former Christian faith due to being aghast that God stated He was a jealous God. She didn’t understand that the Lord of all has the proper right to His creatures’ full allegiance and affection. While jealousy in humans can be a painful emotion and the instigation behind much desperate behavior, that trait in God is fully reasonable and should rightly inspire my increased devotion to Him.
When you were mentioning that jealousy isn't always necessarily evil, I couldn't help but immediately think of marriage. It would be good for a wife to be jealous of her husband was attempting to "step out" on her. He owes her fidelity, and trying to not be faithful is an acceptable thing to be jealous about.
"I am grateful that the Lord has essentially eradicated both those emotions from my daily life."
I take that to indicate that you believe jealousy (and envy) to be, by definition, evil. I personally pray that I will always be jealous for what is God's as He is, and as jealous for what He assigned me as steward as He is. Conversely, we routinely say, "I covet your prayers," and I DO envy people who are more spiritual than I am in my ongoing desire to be more like Him. I don't define "jealousy" or "envy" as sins. Only their improper practice.
You wrote, “Understand ... ‘jealousy’ is not necessarily bad” and then described the appropriate way that the Lord is jealous; I was thinking moreso of the instances where it is “necessarily bad”--i.e. when it would be sinful in me, springing from inferiority, insecurity, distrust, possessiveness, fear, and other unloving emotions. Similarly, I had in mind the envy that emanates from discontentment, unfulfillment, resentment, covetousness, greed, and selfishness--not healthy and positive desires like you mention. I am grateful not to be currently experiencing the “improper practice,” as you say, of jealousy or envy.
I should clarify that personally, I might admire people who are more spiritual than I am, but I would not say that I envy them. (Every definition I found for “envy” had connotations of discontentment, resentment, a selfish desire, or covetousness.) Instead of envying others, I recognize I am a unique work in progress, and I trust God for the spiritual growth He is producing in His own timing--without comparing myself to others.
I AM discontented with my sin. I AM resentful of my sin nature for being in my way of godliness. I complain with Paul, "What I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate" (Rom 7:15) and "Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?" (Rom 7:24). If envy is the desire for what someone else has that I wish I had, I wish I was more like Christ like some people I know. There is such a thing as "benign envy" that clarifies what you value, motivates you without resentment, and strengthens relationships out of admiration rather than competition. I don't want them to lose what they have. I want to go in the same direction.
Admittedly, I initially collected my thoughts about envy yesterday only enough to differentiate it from jealousy (since your post was looking at the latter). (While reading online, I came across this helpful distinction: Envy would be “I want your ___,” while jealousy would be “Don’t take my ___.”) When comparing envy and jealousy, I was thinking of “malicious envy,” in contrast to jealousy (i.e. the valid response to a legitimate threat such as losing one’s partner’s affection). As I said, I was grateful that neither of those strong emotions were in my life right now. I did come across the term “benign envy,” and I would agree that is a good thing, inasmuch as it inspires one to grow and achieve personal aspirations. So used that way, I would concur with your thoughts. And to clarify your initial question to me above, I don’t consider jealousy (and envy) to be evil, but I know of course that they can prompt sinful thoughts and behavior (like all aspects of human nature). I guess it was those extreme scenarios--where the “green-eyed monster” makes its appearance--that I had in mind in all this (perhaps that’s the female perspective ;). Certainly nothing enviable in those situations!
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