The question of the morality of lying has always been a point of contention among believers. We have the very plain command, "You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor" (Exo 20:16). We know that God "does not lie" (Num 23:19; Titus 1:2; Heb 6:18) (The Hebrews reference says "It is impossible for God to lie.") So ... lying is right out ... right? Well ... maybe. I think the truth is not quite so clear.
We know that it is impossible for God to lie, but in
1 Samuel 16, God commanded the prophet, Samuel, to go anoint a new king. Samuel objected. "When Saul hears of it, he'll kill me." So God said, "Take a heifer and tell them you're there to make a sacrifice" (1 Sam 16:1-2). Hang on, isn't that ... an attempt to deceive ... a "lie"? The question is knotty on its own. Samuel did take a heifer and make a sacrifice ... but that wasn't his reason for going. The sacrifice was secondary. Did God intend to deceive Saul? Yes, it seems so. So ... was it not a lie? I mean, it is impossible for God to lie. That's the question, isn't it? Perhaps the answer lies in the commandment. We're not supposed to "bear false witness." In English, to lie is simply the intention to deceive. You can lie by commission or omission. That is, you can make a false statement or simply withhold the truth. Simply withholding the truth is not defined as a lie unless it is intended to deceive. But the command to not bear false witness puts another condition on it. It appears to include the concept of malice ... the intent to cause harm.
You have events in life and events in Scripture that raise the question. God told Samuel to tell Saul something that was intended to deceive. Was that a sin? Rahab covered up the spies (Jos 2:1-6) and she was called a woman of faith for it (Heb 11:31; James 2:25). God blessed the Hebrew midwives who lied about killing Hebrew babies (Exo 1:15-21). Was it a sin to lie about hiding Jews in Nazi Germany? Clearly the Bible is opposed to lying, but it seems it is expressly against lying in order to harm someone. Maybe ... just maybe ... not all lies are sin. If not, I'm not entirely sure what to do with the "God and Samuel" story. I think it is abundantly clear that, biblically, honesty is the best policy. I just don't want to forbid completely what Scripture may not forbid completely.
9 comments:
It has always bothered me a bit that “you shall not bear false witness against your neighbor” is understood (sometimes even translated) as “do not lie.” The wording used in Exo. 20:16 seems to be proscribing something more specific than general dishonesty or uttering untrue statements or falsehoods--i.e. more properly, “you should not lie about or falsely accuse others, particularly in ways that harm their reputation, character, or lead to unjust punishment” (to quote AI Overview). Perjury, slander, gossip, rumors, and false accusations are in view here, I believe. I can see that “to bear false witness” can be interpreted as general lying--although it sounds awkward to the modern ear, I would say. Your post mentions a handful of narratives where dishonesty was at play, but I like your distinction that the intent--i.e. to cause harm to another--bears upon the behavior. As a bit of an aside, I also see that resorting to deceit in order to benefit myself shows a lack of trust in God’s provision, so that is another serious infraction in my mind.
In a recent discussion with someone who declared, "All lying is sin!!", I had to ask ... "What about the classic, 'Do these pants make me look fat?'" He suggested telling the truth ... sideways -- "No, the pants don't." -- which is simply an attempt to misdirect. So what about lying so as not to unnecessarily harm others?
If we didn't live in a sin sick world, all lying would be bad. But there certainly are good examples of lying for good reasons.
I think the “little white lies committed to spare people’s feelings” fall into the slightly different category of gracious social interaction (“etiquette”). Many times, there are ways to answer those types of awkward questions using tact, sensitivity, and diplomacy--responding with consideration for the feelings of others, while still not “fibbing.” The more intimate the relationship, the more honest the discussion might be, but always there are thoughtful ways to give even difficult feedback. In examples like the one you offered, a response to their question would be merely the other person’s opinion anyway, so any reply would really be subjective and not a point of fact. One could reply, “they are not the most flattering style on you, I would say” or “I don’t think they fit you as well as others in your closet do,” rather than a more truthful “yes, I think that they make you look fat [because you are fat and your clothing will not hide that].” A frank and forthright disclosure of one’s private views is not compulsory, and not expressing our full opinions about something/someone at every possible opportunity--even if/when asked--is not lying in the true sense.
So, what do you think, Stan? Should “white lies” trouble one’s conscience, or are they permissible (in the quest of loving others as ourselves)?
Lorna, I started with "the truth is not clear" on the topic of lying and "white lies" is really difficult for me. Like most lying, rarely are they intended a benefit for others. Most often they're used to protect self, even if it's a "benevolent" self-protection. (e.g., "I'm not going to tell her the truth that those pants make her look fat BECAUSE SHE'LL BE MAD AT ME.") And it seems like, if we modify "lie" to "white lie," we should be able to modify ... adultery, for instance, to "white adultery" because it really wasn't intended to be that bad. Obviously stupid, but I hope you understand. I tend more toward the black and white.
I too am not comfortable with dishonesty, and I try hard not to intentionally express untruths. I am as equally convinced that I should be gracious and kind to others (that ol’ “grace and truth” paradox)--but of course not to the point of lying to them. So while I don’t resort to uttering “white lies,” I try to consider the effect my words have on others and seek a way to sensitively put a positive spin on any negative judgment I might hold (as much as possible). In the example above, the issue for me would not be that “she’ll be mad at me” but that “she will be hurt by my bluntness.” Even that might appear to be self-protection (i.e. “she will be hurt and then also mad at me”), but concern for the feelings of others is a real factor for me (as is the reality that my opinion is not “truth”). But yes, I understand your point and agree. Fortunately, I think there are ways to speak the truth in love and practice the Golden Rule even while being a person of integrity. I believe God will give me wisdom for such situations as I seek it, so that my words will be gracious and edifying (Eph. 4:29).
I'm also uncomfortable with the so common, "You lied to me!!" when all they did was fail to tell something. It's not a "lie" if it was not the intent to deceive. Omitting information CAN be a lie, but doesn't HAVE to be. We're so confused so much of the time, I think.
And the flip side of “You lied to me!!” would be “You told me the truth, and I didn’t like it!!” (which is more often my transgression, rather than keeping too quiet). Sometimes a “Jonathan” finds his receptive “David,” and other times, the prophet is murdered by his target audience. Since God knows our hearts and confusion abounds, as you say, I guess Prov. 25:11-12 is good to keep in mind: “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver; like an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold is a wise rebuker to an obedient ear.” May our “speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt” (Col. 4:6)--and always truthful and void of deceit!
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