"Gender" Confusion

We are still debating gender in our society these days. One side says, "You are the gender you feel you are regardless of what you're born with" and the other says, "That's nonsense; you are the gender you're born with and to feel differently is confusion." Please note: "confusion" is not an insult. They used to call it "gender confusion" themselves, but it sounded insulting so they switched to "dysphoria" -- "a state of unease or generalized dissatisfaction." I think, however, that we all have "gender" confusion. I don't mean the kind we're arguing about. I mean with terminology. We are imprecise with our words (How can we be precise when they are constantly shifting?), so we are imprecise without understanding -- confusion. So let's see if we can ease this end of the discussion a bit.

We have two words we often use interchangeably: "sex" and "gender." They are not technically interchangeable; we just do it. "Sex" refers to essentially chromosomes -- XX or XY. "Sex" refers to anatomy, specifically of the reproductive system. In the science world XX is female and XY is male and never the twain shall meet. (We will set aside "intersex" for the moment because that has nothing to do with this part of the conversation. "Intersex" and "transgender" are apples and oranges.) "Gender," on the other hand, is a reference to what we refer to as "masculine" and "feminine." It is the expression of male and female sex as we understand it. This is obvious in our current "no binary gender" world when "he" feels like he's a "she" and then assumes feminine characteristics and appearance (or vice versa). We all know what "masculine" and "feminine" characteristics and appearance look like ... and that's "gender." In those terms, "gender confusion" per se has always been around. We've always had girls (sex) who were "tom boys" (gender) and guys (sex) who were "effeminate" (gender). But even then we all understood "sex" and "gender" and what was what. Like the old song said, even a child "knows one sex from the other; all he has to do is look" ("Doin' What Comes Natur'lly," 1946).

So while we debate this stuff with each other, it turns out we've been in perfect agreement and still shouting past each other. We will use a phrase like "biological sex" to describe what they were born with and then "gender identity" to describe how they feel about their gender ... and both are accurate. Then we'll be offended when they say, "This one identifies as a female" (gender) and argue, "But, he was born a male" (sex). Again, both are accurate. The problem arises when "how I feel about my gender" becomes the definition of "my sex." In one of my favorite Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck/Elmer Fudd cartoons, Bugs tricks Daffy into making Elmer shoot Daffy. When he gets his beak back in place, he discovers the reason: "pronoun trouble."

Daffy had no idea how much trouble pronouns would become. Now they're reasons for lawsuits, lost jobs, and criminal accusations.

I have not solved the question for a single person at this point. Not my aim at this point. I just hope that we can take one step back to start to take steps forward. One's sex refers to the body and that is a birth condition, not something assigned by a doctor or a parent. Gender is the expression of maleness or femaleness and everyone has options in that area. Always has. Regardless of whether or not it matches your sex, we all still know what masculinity and femininity look like. No reason to keep arguing over that. All that's left is the definition of reality. Is it how I feel or what is actually real? That's the discussion we should be having. Oh, no, we won't. Because we, as a society, have generally rejected Truth (John 14:6) and operate blindly (2 Cor 4:4) as children of the father of lies (Jer 17:9). But I can dream, can't I?