Love Defined by the Cross

If there is a primary ethic in the Christian faith, it is love. When Jesus was tested about "the great commandment of the Law," He answered with two commands: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind," and "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." He concluded, "On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets" (Matt. 22:34–40). Love, then, stands at the very center of biblical faith. But to ask it the way the classic song does: What is this thing called love?

Because Scripture introduces love, Scripture must also define it. In his first epistle, the apostle John develops a clear and logical answer. He begins with a foundational statement: "God is love" (1 John 4:8). This does not mean that God merely feels affection. It means that love is defined by who God is. John continues, "We love because He first loved us" (1 John 4:19). God defines love, initiates love, and enables our love by first loving us.

How, then, did God love us? Jesus answers in one of the most familiar verses in Scripture: "For God so loved the world …" (John 3:16). That word "so" does not describe quantity, as though God loved "so much." It describes quality—the manner in which God loved the world. Jesus immediately explains: "He gave His only Son." Biblical love is therefore sacrificial. It acts for the highest good of the one loved. In this case, the highest good was "that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life." Love, then, is sacrifice on behalf of another for their ultimate benefit. As Jesus taught elsewhere, what you treasure defines what you love (Matt. 6:21).

Jesus did not stop with defining God's love. He applied that definition directly to His followers. "A new commandment I give to you," He instructed His disciples to "love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another" (John 13:34). This radically redefines what it means for believers to love. Not merely as they naturally would, but as Christ Himself loved them. Jesus clarified that meaning even further: "Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). Love is self-giving, even self-sacrificial. Paul echoes this truth when he writes, "One will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die—but God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Rom. 5:7–8). Jesus's command, then, is unmistakable: Love like that.

Warm feelings are not wrong, but Scripture consistently shows that biblical love is not centered on what we receive, but on what we give. It is self-sacrifice for the good of another. And Jesus gives this love a visible purpose: "By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:35).

So the question remains: Is that us?