Holy Ambivalence

Ambivalence is an interesting word. The suffix, "valence," is rooted in the idea of "capacity." So "equivalence" suggests "equal capacity." The prefix is "ambi," meaning "both". So, while we generally view it as a synonym for "apathy," the actual impact of the word is quite the opposite. The word means most literally to be drawn in two directions. Ambivalence toward a particular idea, for instance, would mean that you were both drawn to and repelled from that idea in more or less equal measure, leaving you uncertain what to do. It is this concept that I find in Scripture.

I've been in First and Second Corinthians of late and repeatedly come across some rather harsh texts. In 1 Corinthians 5, for instance, a church member is living in sin with his father's wife (1 Cor 5:1). Paul tells them to "deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord" (1 Cor 5:5). Do you see the two directions? "Destruction of the flesh" is held in tension with "his spirit may be saved." Ambivalence. In that same chapter, Paul tells the Corinthian believers "not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler -- not even to eat with such a one" (1 Cor 5:11). Now, hang on a second. Aren't we supposed to love such a person? Aren't we supposed to "restore him in a spirit of gentleness" (Gal 6:1). Yes ... to both "not to associate" and to seek restoration. Ambivalence. We are supposed to be concerned about feeding the hungry and recognize that "If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat" (2 Thess 3:10). Ambivalence. Paul told the Corinthian believers that they were not to disassociate from the world (1 Cor 5:10) and, in the next breath, "go out from their midst, and be separate from them" (2 Cor 6:17). Ambivalence.

We are called to holy ambivalence. We are called to work out our salvation with fear and trembling and trust that it is God who is at work in us to will and to do His good work (Php 2:12-13). We are to be "wise as serpents and innocent as doves" (Matt 10:16). We are to long to die and be with Christ and long to live to serve Christ (Php 1:21-24). We are to be drawn toward sinners in need of Christ and drawn toward becoming more holy. Holy ambivalence.