It's that woman You gave me

When God found Adam and Eve hiding in the garden because they were naked and heard their confession of guilt, He asked, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?" Adam answered "The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate." Eve wasn't much different. "The serpent deceived me, and I ate" (Gen 3:11-13). It is the ever-present excuse. Someone else is to blame.

We are steeped in it. It's somebody else. My wife, my husband, my boss, my children, my friends, my circumstances, just about anything at all can bear the brunt of guilt for what I did. Anything but me, of course. "It was my upbringing or my infirmities. My parents were at fault. Society made me what I am today." Or, of course, today's most popular, "I was born this way."

We use this method practically daily to avoid the blame for errors and sins. It is a handy tool to escape consequences. "I didn't shoot the man; the gun just went off." "I know I gamble too much; I think it's just the product of an addictive personality disorder." Oh, yeah, that one is a good one. "Personality disorder." Happens all the time. The kid is too active or doesn't pay attention, so we label it as a "disorder" and offer medication. We lock up criminals and hope to rehabilitate them. We offer AA or NA or whatever other help groups we can found or find to assist people in overcoming their disorders. Because, as we all know, bad things happen to good people. And whether it's a personality disorder or a genetic disorder or a gender disorder, we can fix it. You just sit back and relax, poor thing. We can help.

Of course, while it may appear to ease the problems, I would argue that, in fact, it produces the opposite effect. First people faced with "disorders" become passive because, after all, "It's not me. It's something happening to me." And, don't worry. Help is on the way. So we wait. We don't work at fixing the problem. We call the landlord or we make a doctor's appointment ... or, likely, not ... because, after all, can they actually treat this condition? We wonder why the government hasn't come up with a program that will help and maybe petition the governor's office or march on Washington. Because this happened to us, so someone needs to fix it. And, oh, while we wait, you know, since help has not yet arrived, we will probably continue in the problem we are indulging due to, you know, the condition that has befallen us. "I might be able to get a job, but it's not a good job and it's not my fault that I'm in my condition, so I'll just complain about it and wait. Oh, hey, I know! Maybe I can get them to raise the minimum wage!" "Sure, perhaps I could make the effort to get off drugs, but there are programs and it's not my fault anyway and, besides, I'm in this condition so I can't stop anyway." As time passes, however, and cures don't cure, we start to wonder if the "disorder" is a disorder at all. "Hey, maybe it's normal! Yeah, that's it! Let's just say that it's a good thing! Look how many are like me! It can't be bad if there are so many of us."

Starting at the seemingly benign "It's that woman You gave me", we end up so ensconced in what, as it turns out, is our own choices that we can't break out. It's not that there is no possibility. It's that we're not trying. It's just "the way I am." Indeed, if we've worked it properly, we've embraced it. "Sure, sure, same-sex attraction isn't normal by any sane mathematical consideration, but I have it so I'll call it good and indulge it to the full!" People have made careers (using the term loosely) of never working, never having a job, perpetual drug addiction or sex addiction or some other "disorder" because they now see it as something to be proud of, not something to correct. Not because it is, but because they started with "It's that woman You gave me." You see, in the end, it is God who is to blame. Isn't that what they tell us? "If God made me this way, it's good." So, blaming anyone but ourselves, we find ourselves at the bottom of the pit looking up and thinking, "It's a good thing!"

Although they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks to Him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things (Rom 1:21-23).

Claiming to be wise, we become fools. Jesus's message, on the other hand, is not, "It's okay; it's that woman God gave you." It is "Repent!" (Matt 4:17; Mark 1:15; Luke 13:1-5; John 8:11).