I'm older now, but there was a time I could quote all of Psalm 139. I love that psalm. You see, I've always had a problem with self-image. This psalm seemed to be written for me.
Look at this wonderful text. It begins with the absolute certainty that God has searched me and knows me. Me! I'm not unknown. I'm not worthless. The text goes on to describe the depths of His knowledge. He is where I sit and stand, my paths, my words. "Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, YHWH, You know it altogether" (Psa 139:4). He hems me in, behind, before, and above (Psa 139:5). I'm known and I'm safe. The text talks about how He knew me as He formed me. Imagine that! "You knitted me together in my mother's womb" (Psa 139:13). Think about that. No mistakes. No inferior work. God knitted me together. "I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psa 139:14). Included in all this design is this astounding claim. "Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them" (Psa 139:16). Every day is already recorded. Every event, every choice, every outcome. He's planned it. "How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! (Psa 139:17).
David (the author) rails against the wicked (Psa 139:19-22), but comes back to himself. "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" (Psa 139:23-24). A good place to stay, under God's microscope with God's testing and God's correction. He cares. He did it. He is taking care of me. Now ... what was it I found so offensive about my self?
2 comments:
When I read through Psalm 139, I learn from David’s example that the Lord knows, and has always known, everything about me and my actions; this does, of course, foster a sense of intimacy between God and me and a foundational trust that He is in control of my life--“I am known…and He is taking care of me,” as you say. I also see the more general truth that God knows everything about everyone, as befitting an all-knowing God. My Bible heads this psalm, “God’s Perfect Knowledge of Man,” which to me means not only this specific woman but all men and women. Indeed, any person can enter a loving relationship with the Lord--not just Bible heroes like the “Man After God’s Own Heart” but anyone who takes those words to heart. “Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.” It does make one feel pretty good about themselves--and for all the right reasons!
Having an accurate picture of ourselves, is vital as we relate to YHWH and others. Believing that we are inherently "good", and that our minor sins won't be held against us, is one of the bigger problems in The Church today. Likewise, the assumption that YHWH grades on a curve and that it's all about being better than those we compare ourselves against.
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