The word is "oxymoron." Most probably know that word, but for those of you who don't, it refers to a literary device that combines two apparently contradictory terms to convey a new idea. Like, "old news" or "jumbo shrimp" or "virtual reality" or "awfully good" or "military intelligence." One that often comes up is "happily married." Ladies and gentleman, I am a living oxymoron because I am precisely happily married. I love my wife. She loves me. We don't have significant disagreements. We don't have conflicts over what to do, where to go, what to eat, how to spend our money, any of the standard conflicts in the majority of marriages. We fit. We are well-suited for each other. We are ... happily married.
I was thinking the other day that, while I'm quite certain my wife loves me from her words to her deeds, I don't know why. I'm not a real ... catch. I'm not rich, handsome, loads of fun, sexy ... any of that stuff. When I first met her, I asked what she wanted in a husband. Short, thin, bald, no facial hair, on and on about characteristics that were the opposite of me. I often suffer from delusions of adequacy -- I know I'm not great, but I think I'm "good enough" in a lot of areas. Yet, every time I start to think that, something happens to tell me it just isn't so. I'm human, prone to error, make mistakes. I'm useless around the house for fixing stuff. Digital is more my thing. I am no great catch ... and still, she loves me. Still. Without reserve. Which only makes me appreciate, value, and love her more.
Jesus, speaking of the sinful woman who cleaned His feet, said, "Her sins, which are many, have been forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little, loves little" (Luke 7:47). I am awed every day, it seems, that Jesus loves me and died for me. I'm no catch for my wife, but I was His enemy (Rom 5:10). I'm not an extremely capable worker for my wife, but He chose the foolish and the weak (1 Cor 1:26-31). In terms of God's standards of perfection (Matt 5:48), I'm not even in the vicinity, but He ransomed sinners (Matt 20:28). Daily I'm aware that I'm not what I should be. Clearly He didn't choose me because He thought I was. And for that, I am extremely grateful and amazed that He loves me. For that I love Him more and more.
Further understanding of the doctrines of grace make salvation more amazing every day. A false understanding of our sinfulness and His holiness cheapens grace.
ReplyDeleteI do enjoy oxymorons, especially the awfully good or seriously funny ones. I also liked your focus on feeling “gratefully loved” (alas, not an oxymoron)--whether by a spouse or by the Lord.
ReplyDeleteFifty-three years ago, when I first “sized up” the teenaged boy who was to eventually become my husband, I was only considering his potential as a bowling date (no thoughts of husband material at that point). Although I did not immediately notice the definite possibility for a future together that was there, God knew it all, and He brought His good plans to fruition.
Likewise, God had good plans in mind when He chose me to join His family. As you say, that can really mystify and amaze us, when we realize that we are no “prize” in God’s eyes. (If I were, I wouldn’t warrant that lifetime of transformation I am undergoing!) “What is man, that You are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?” (Ps. 8:4) Just like feeling unworthy of being happily married, it is wonderful to be deemed precious in God’s sight--not because of my loveliness but out of His lovingkindness.
Keep it up, Lorna. I'm sure you have a few more oxymorons to offer. :)
DeleteI’m guessing you knew that my offering a few more was a definite maybe :) because, as you well know, there is a whole list out there in random order. I constrained myself above to include only those that fit my comment--being mindful that spontaneity is good as long as it’s controlled. I am sure you know that even the word “oxymoron” is itself an oxymoron (i.e. “sharp-dull”)!
DeleteI will share that whenever I mention “oxymoron” to my terribly nice husband, he always replies, “well, you got the ‘moron’ part right” :). My use of that word with him is clearly misunderstood; therefore, my only choice is to consider him a bit of an idiot savant--and that’s my unbiased opinion. Finally, I must point out that your blog tagline refers to foolish wisdom and is clearly offered up by a wise fool of sorts :-D.
Thinking about being precious to another person, I really like this quote from Dr. Seuss (of all people!): “To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.”
ReplyDeleteI thought that was Brad Paisley.
DeleteIt is apparently a quote from Dr. Seuss’ book, Oh, the Places You’ll Go! The lyrics in the country song are, “To the world you may be just another girl, but to me, baby, you are the world.” That is close but doesn’t have the clever perfect flip-flop message of the original. (I’ve actually seen it as a quote at the Soundscapes Music Choice channel I regularly play, where it was attributed to another random person.)
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